Tag: lifestyle

  • 14 Tips for Creatives Who Want to Move to A Big City Now

    14 Tips for Creatives Who Want to Move to A Big City Now

    For many, moving to the big city is a sort of dream. For creatives in particular, the move to a big city could mean actually having the resources to pursue your craft. The shine of the bright lights and golden opportunities draws people, hoping for a better life. With that said, you shouldn’t necessarily move the moment the chance pops up. However, if you start planning and preparing now, you’ll be ready when the time comes, even if it’s last minute. Above all else, you want to consider what the move will mean for your life and whether it’s the best thing for you.

    What cities are at the top of your list? Every place offers a different rhythm, and finding the right beat for you is all part of the fun. Start by thinking about what you want to get out of your move and narrow it down from there. It’s a lot of work, but with time, patience, and solid research, it’ll be worthwhile. Besides, you won’t truly know how much you’ll love it until you actually get there. Good luck!

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    Big City Bound: Before the Move

    Tips for Moving to A Big City - Couple cardboard boxes
    Credit: Karolina Grabowska

    Subscribe to local magazine and newspaper newsletters

    You’ll get a lay of things going on in the city from a local’s perspective and be introduced to the neighborhoods and culture there.

    Look for resources and programs that support your hobbies and interests. Find out where the good hiking trails are, and see what enrichment programs the local library has, and check out museums. See what leisure classes are available at local colleges and universities. Check for makers markets and artists collectives, subscribe to their newsletters, and follow them on social media.

    Estimate the cost of living

    The starving artist trope is overrated: Ask yourself is how much it costs to live in the city. Compare the cost of living of where you currently live to your target city at Numbeo so that you can plan for budget changes. How much money will you have to spend just to get by? Cities can be far more expensive than many people imagine. Even if you don’t need a car because of good public transport, you still need to think carefully about how your money will be spent. Public transport isn’t free, and wages tend to be significantly higher, pushing up the costs of any services you might want to use. 

    Seek affordable housing in the big city

    Housing is a major priority when you’re looking to move. It’s better to have some ideal spots before you get there. Not only houses or apartments, but neighborhoods as well. Additionally, you want to make sure that moving is financially viable, even if there’s a job opportunity on the horizon. The FHA FAQs does a good job breaking down financing and other factors to consider if you’re looking to buy instead of rent. You’ll want a mortgage that doesn’t consume more than 30 percent of your disposable, after-tax income. Crunch the numbers to be sure you’ll have sufficient funds to live life on your terms in the city. 

    Check the weather

    Consider what the weather will be like in the new place. Cities can differ vastly in their climate, even in the same country. You can be baking hot all year in Las Vegas, but spend six months in relatively icy conditions or rain somewhere like Seattle. Do you want to live somewhere that gets all four seasons, or would you prefer a warmer climate where you can wear breezy clothing all year round? There’s somewhere for everyone!

    Research the job market

    Maybe you haven’t yet struck gold in your creative field or maybe you have no interest in turning your creative passion into a career. Unless you’re doing remote work that can move with you, consider whether the city’s job market offers everything you need. That could be a day job to hold you over or a long-term career move.

    Also, some cities have attractive house prices, but problematic economies. You might be able to easily find an affordable place to live, but no one willing to hire you. And even if you take a job, you might have to put up with a significantly lower wage, which lower housing costs don’t make up for. Research well to find your best fit.

    Consider big city nightlife

    Where you are in life can impact what you’re looking for when it comes to the city nightlife. Keep in mind that it doesn’t have to only include bars and clubs. Nightlife can also encompass other things the city has to offer, like restaurants and even late-opening museums. Going to a quiet place might not be the best option for you if you’re the sort of person who loves socializing and getting to know people the moment you go to a new city. Weigh all of your options to see where you’d love to hang out after dark.

    Tour as much as you can

    Every city has it’s own history, culture, and vibe. To make sure it’s in alignment with who you are as well as your lifestyle, take a tour of your desired city given by a well-connected guide before you move. In person is your safest bet, but technology has advanced enough for digital to work if accessible transportation isn’t available. Regardless of how you get there, you learn so much being a tourist in your own city. Plus, all those tidbits you gain can be passed along to visitors when they come to see you!

    It’s best to visit and live like a local for a few days. See the different neighborhoods in person. Visit local grocery stores and other businesses. Get a feel for how you might get around town after you move: City bus? Subway? How is the traffic? Check what the rideshare and services are like if you use them. If you practice a religion or faith, visit places of worship and connect with the people there. 


    Big City Living: After the Move

    Tips for Moving to a Big City: Buildings in Chicago
    Credit: Chris Dickens

    Give yourself time to get acclimated to the new city

    Be okay with being new. Explore your new city and feel comfortable getting lost because even with GPS you’ll probably get turned around.

    Make connections with Meetup and other networking platforms

    No joke, Meetup needs to be stop #1. By filtering your interests, you’ll find your people. Every city has a mix of free and paid events where you can engage in your creative interests directly. There are photo walks, retro film nights, improv, and tango dancing, to name a few. You can also just hang out with other people that do what you do or join a group for something casual like drinks or food. It’s extremely helpful and low threat because no one is going to show up who isn’t at least lightly interested in the thing(s) that you are. You can also try out Bumble BFF and subscribe to Discords of local meetup groups.

    Use coffee shop community message boards

    It’s old school, but by using this method, you’re going be able to get a mix of social events. You might find folks giving lessons, advertising for studio spaces, and other activities from organizers who love posting on those boards. You can also invest in the best custom stickers cheap and slap them on anything so people recognise who you are. A little personal branding can go a long way, and stickers are a fun way to brand and market yourself as a creative, especially if you are planning to freelance!

    Find a space for your craft

    Whether you’re an artist, writer, musician, or in another field entirely, this is the place where you can stretch your creative muscles. If it’s in a common space, the likelihood for social connections increases, too. Alone or among others, this location will help you to immediately get back into your creative groove and make your new city begin to feel like home. Pick somewhere you feel comfortable, relaxed, and inspired. Also, you can choose a spot where there are decent places nearby if you want a break for food, people watching, or a walk.

    Meet your neighborhood

    Really get to know the history and culture of your specific neighborhood. The city may be sprawling, but it’s so nice to get cozy with everything right around your block. Additionally, it’s a good idea to know where to find your nearest hospital, international market, movie theater, neighborhood bar, playground, safe gas stations, and more. That way, you’ll feel more secure and respect everything around you.

    Make finding your new favorite places an adventure

    Discovery doesn’t end after you’re all moved in and settled. New people, places, and things are popping up every day, so making sure you continue exploring. It could also work magic to keep your creative ideas fresh and flowing. You’ll have a delicious time finding a Thai spot that rivals your favorite from home or stumbling upon a boutique theater that plays hard-to-find indie films. It’s even better if you can get recommendations from peeps who’ve been there longer and can go with you to try them out. 

    Keep in touch with your existing social groups

    Relationships are precious, and there are so many tools available now to stay connected. Set up weekly — or monthly — virtual hangout sessions with your friends and family. This could be on video conference platforms, like Zoom, or something more interactive like a video game, such as Nintendo Switch, Playstation, or classic computer RPGs.

    Header: Tyler Nix

  • Like Magic: 4 Steps to Realizing Your Vision

    Like Magic: 4 Steps to Realizing Your Vision

    “Make the choice to let go of everything you’re so attached to that’s not serving you and manifest the reality that you want. Life is an illusion created by your perception, and it can be changed the moment you choose to change it.” 
    — Jen Sincero, You Are a Badass


    When I was an adolescent aspiring singer-songwriter-playwright-actor-veterinarian, I thought people were “discovered” for what they would wind up doing for the rest of their lives. Entertainers were plucked off the street — in malls, at gas stations — because they looked like they could perform, business execs were presented with their first power suit and briefcase before high school, chefs just knew how to cook and made the right dish for the right person at the right time, and veterinarians hugged enough furry friends to know how to care for them medically. It was inherent. Natural, but also magical. Magical, like the two times I can recall making a wish before falling asleep that I would wake up as a kangaroo and a lion. As you can see, I’m still very much human.

    Once I got older and logic set in, so did the realization that it’s not so much about being discovered as it is you discovering. It’s learning who you are, what you’re passionate about, and putting yourself in a position to take on projects that fall in line with your values, whether it’s career-based, hobby-related, or simply to be a better YOU. (I would have made a terrific kangaroo, by the way.) There was a point in time when I was under the impression that the safe, expected route was the only one worth taking, and the voices around me served to solidify the doubt in what I was drawn towards by nature. This causes floundering, and not the cute kind that hangs out with Ariel.

    It’s a battle within between your head and your heart, which should actually be working in tandem.

    The steps to creating a desired outcome can be broken down into four parts: Speak, See, Take, Grow. There is no set timeframe that one should transition into another. It’s based on your readiness, which is determined by the person who knows it best: You. Being ready doesn’t mean being totally fearless, but rather being able to give fear, doubt, and hesitation the backseat because you have enough confidence, knowledge (or skill), and drive to steer the vehicle.

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    Happy weekending! 🦄✨✨

    A post shared by Britt Franklin (@franklybritt) on

    STEP 1: Speak Your Vision

    Imagination is a powerful and wonderful tool to use to boost your confidence in pursuing your dreams. In your imagination, possibilities are endless. More often than not, if you can create the image in your mind, you can make it happen. The trick is that you have to believe it. You have to believe that it’s already yours, and it’s right there at the forefront, waiting for you to take your place in the sun.

    In the beginning, you won’t know how to do it, but stay open to the possibilities. By knowing and focusing on your vision, a plan will come. Say it out loud! Write it down! Paint it across the wall! Build it out of clay! “If you can dream it, you can be it,” said Walt Disney. It’s already yours.

    “The moment you have the audacity to start believing in the not-yet-seen, your reality will begin to shift… You have to change your thinking first, and then the evidence appears. Our big mistake is that we do it the other way around. We demand to see the evidence before we believe it to be true.”

    — Jen Sincero, You Are a Badass

    Want a real life example? In an interview with Starry Constellation Magazine, actress Vanessa Lengies spoke on how she came to her role on Fox’s Second Chance:

    Lisa Steinberg (@StarryMag): What drew you to take on another drama or drew you to audition for the role?

    Vanessa: It’s actually kind of a magical story. I am Canadian. I am from Montreal and I have been living in Los Angeles for thirteen years now. I had decided in July after I went home for my thirtieth birthday that I wanted to try living in Canada for a bit, specifically Vancouver. I had filmed a movie there for Showtime once and a couple pilots. I told my friends around the beginning of August and then this came up around mid-August. I really loved this pilot script when I read it. I was in love with it from the get-go. They said, “They really love you for it, but it films in Vancouver.” It felt like the universe was just answering my desire that I spoke aloud in July. It was kind of that magical coincidence not coincidence with things falling into place for me.

    When you decide and believe “This is the thing I want to accomplish,” factors that could make it possible naturally begin to shift. This is just one of many varying tracks when it comes to the universe answering your call. Maybe things fall into place, maybe it’s a matter of recognizing the moment when it comes. Either way, it’s up to you to make the final choice once the word is out because your awareness has now been piqued. So…

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    Today was beautiful ☀️

    A post shared by Britt Franklin (@franklybritt) on

    STEP 2: See Opportunity

    It’s a lot like magic. It could look like magic. Your senses are heightened, and you know what you want. You may or may not have a plan, but you’ve put it out into the universe (prayed on it, meditated, told a friend or few—whatever your version of “put it out into the universe” may be), and opportunities to climb aboard the S.S. My Future is Mine are starting to sprout up.

    A while back, I’d been talking about going to visit Tennessee since taking a trip to Memphis with my family and one to Nashville to audition for The Glee Project (Yeah… that happened.) — Different trips, same eventual desire. I didn’t know how I was going to get there or when. I’d tried to arrange road trips with friends that fizzled out, and so it became one of those “When it happens, it’ll happen.” One day, a friend of mine was visiting New Orleans from TN, and we missed each other, but I told her that I was planning to visit her state at some point soonish. Again, no idea of when or how, but I was going. Fast-forward a few weeks, and I end up booking a gig that films in Memphis because the opportunity presented itself and I took a leap of faith. Had it been a few months earlier, I likely would have passed over the chance. It just wouldn’t have registered as a possibility.

    Options you may not have given a second glance before suddenly seem to jump out at you. Things you didn’t think you were capable of now seem possible. They ARE possible! So, what are you going to do about it? Psst…this is when you tell those partners-in-crime Fear and Doubt to shove it because you don’t need them right now. Fear of judgment or failure aren’t true red flags, they’re more like red herrings. Really obnoxious, pushy ones that get into your head. Listen to your heart, and also your mind, but mostly your heart. Make a practice of envisioning your desire, remaining free of attachment to the specifics of the journey, and seizing opportunity when it inevitably comes your way. Then…

    STEP 3: Take Action

    If it’s not happening as quickly as you expected, do not give up. That can’t be stressed enough. Your journey is just that: YOURS. Don’t make comparisons to what someone else has done or is doing. Every step you take forward is a motion in progress, not regress. 

    You are going to make mistakes. Accept it, and be okay with it. A setback is not a dead-end, but an opportunity to learn how to overcome and improve for the next attempt. You might even find a way around the thing that held you up altogether. A mistake is not a sign that what you want is not what you deserve. The power in symbols comes from the meanings you give them, which is exactly why someone can look at a rainy day and see it as a fine time to catch up on rest or play in puddles, while another person will see it as a bad omen and that they shouldn’t leave the house that day. It’s all about perception. Make your move, and…

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    Message ✨ #Teatery

    A post shared by Britt Franklin (@franklybritt) on

    STEP 4: Flourish

    The top definition of flourish is to “grow or develop in a healthy or vigorous way, especially as the result of a particularly favorable environment.”

    Others include:

    • to achieve success
    • to be in a state of activity or production
    • to reach a height of development or influence

    Then, there’s my personal favorite: to grow luxuriantly.

    See, it’s not necessarily being at the finish line. You’re going to GROW. And that favorable environment? That’s your mindset. Congratulations! Enjoy it. Every day won’t be perfect or even good, but knowing deep down that you’re moving forward will be your best asset in holding on to the joy that brought you the courageousness that inspired you to take the reins and thrive. You aren’t the same person you were when you started. You know more, you fear less, and that in itself is an accomplishment. Perhaps you’ve achieved your goal, so what’s next?

    Remember: Your vision can change and you can change along with it. If your heart isn’t in it anymore, there’s nothing wrong with taking a step back to reassess and regroup. 

    Now go off, be luxuriant, be the person you want to be, and revel in the magic.

    Cover Image: Cristian Escobar

  • Intentional Living Is More than a Temporary Trend

    Intentional Living Is More than a Temporary Trend

    In the last days of winter with the beginning of spring on the horizon, how are you feeling?

    As leaves start to slowly fill branches and bushes, the renewed cycle of seasons comes with the checkpoint marking a year since we all had to put our lives on hold with extreme caution at the forefront. Without rehashing the story we’ve been and are still living through, it’s safe to say it’s been a rough year across the board. Riding waves of ups and downs with an undercurrent of constant distress is taxing on our well-being; and it’s fine to admit that. We should admit to that.

    It’s okay to not be okay, and once that’s acknowledged,
    we can do the work to navigate through it.

    We found ways to cope and live on, whether it was diving deeper into work, playing hours of Animal Crossing; thriving on social media, or doing absolutely nothing but make sure we were as safe as possible. These are all choices, signs that through it all we’re preserving at least some of the agency we have over ourselves; even while facing many situations that feel so far out of our control. You might feel pressured to be productive, but productivity is a tool of intentional living, not its driving force. Rest counts, too.

    Photo by Ross Sneddon

    When we were in planning stages at the end of last year, the word intentional kept coming up. So, we decided it was the perfect term to carry with us in 2021 as we attempt to reach — if not a sense of “normalcy” (whatever that looks like) — then at the very least some better grip on our next moves. That’s where implementing a practice of intentional living comes in; and we don’t take that lightly. All the choices we’ve been making to simply get by have been intentional; so rather than write it off as a new age trend or feel guilty about taking care of yourself, really embrace it. Chances are you’ve been living intentionally anyway; it’s just another extension of self-love and self-care.

    “Intentional living means understanding your fundamental beliefs and values and then actively living your life in line with those values.”

    — “What It Means To Live Your Life With Intention,” The Good Trade

    Living intentionally helps to keep us from checking out. It also encourages us to stay connected to ourselves and learn more about who we are at our roots. If there’s something we can certainly use after a year of events happening to us, it’s taking an active role in our lives and making decisions for ourselves.

    intentional living - blowing confetti
    Photo by Hugo Ruiz

    — 3 STEPS TOWARD INTENTIONAL LIVING —

    Ask yourself questions and don’t be afraid to answer

    If you haven’t already made a habit of living intentionally, change can be scary. We’re evolving people. What suited us in the past may no longer serve us in the present; which applies to everything from certain flavors we find appealing to how we interact with others and how we’re treated. When facing the crossroads of whether or not you want something in your life, ask if it aligns with the person you are today and who you’d like to be in the future instead of who you were yesterday. You just might find out a surprising fact about yourself, such as your favorite color changing from red to green. You won’t know until you ask without shying away from it. 

    Dare to say no

    We tend to play up the act of saying yes to experiences, but saying no is just as important. It establishes boundaries. If someone offers you a hamburger because you used to like them so much, but now you’re a vegetarian, you aren’t going to accept it, right? If the taste doesn’t sit well on your palate, don’t even put it in your mouth. Say no when necessary. And if your no happens to change to a maybe or even a yes at a later date, you have the authority to make that call yourself.

    Give yourself permission to live the life you want

    So many factors come into play when we’re curating our lives. Giving yourself permission to “live as you choose” could sound a lot like shutting everyone else out to strike out on your own; however, that’s simply not the case. We live our own lives, but we aren’t the only component of it. If the life you want means jetting off on your own with no one to answer to, you’re allowed to have that. If the life you want means settling down with other people and being a caretaker or being the one taken care of, you’re allowed to have that, too.

    Remember that the state of being is not a singular thing. We’re constantly changing, and life is constantly evolving. Don’t fear transformation. Adapt and keep moving forward. There’s no turning back now.

    Are you curating a life with intention? What helps you to live intentionally?

    Header: DESIGNECOLOGIST

  • Black Woman Living: Navigating An Uncaring World

    Black Woman Living: Navigating An Uncaring World

    Searching for joy feels like an act of defiance in a world that would rather I, and other women like me, have none. That choice to choose happiness above everything else is the impetus behind our Find the Fun theme this year and the reason we’re still here pushing through all the murk that is 2020 — and for me personally, the last ten years of my life. 

    The Black Woman’s Lament™  is a song that’s been wailed from the fringes of society for generations. Living is hard and there are rarely easy answers to the many problems we face, especially when those problems are created and perpetuated by a system that gathers its strength from our submission and pain. Being weary is a part of the story; it’s not the whole story nor is it the part that we want our lives defined by. Fannie Lou Hamer famously said, “I’m sick and tired of being sick and tired.” Me too, Ms. Fannie. There hasn’t been a better way to sum it up since 1964

    It’s hard to love, to be free, to sleep.

    Luckily, my community saves me every single day. We check on each other asking “Sis, are you okay, really?” both knowing we’re not, but we’re trying anyway. Admitting we don’t feel strong and want to shrink away from the duties we have to be friends, lovers, sister, daughters, activists. We shout for the right to simply exist. 

    There is no true place of peace on this planet for a Black woman. Often I fantasize about what it would be like if the world didn’t actively work to harm us: to be able to sleep peacefully in our beds at night and know we won’t be killed by state sanctioned violence, to embrace our true selves when we were born in the wrong body and not be murdered (and forgotten for it), to give birth and know our fears and concerns will be addressed without hesitation, to refuse to uphold a white supremacist standard of beauty and not be demonized for it. 

    I have a Pinterest board titled Unbothered which serves as the entry to a fantasy world of Black women living at peace, smiling, and doing mundane things. That’s a tiny illustration of how much I long for us to be left alone. Being free to do whatever is enough of a fantasy to warrant a mood board about it. Damn. Y’all. That’s — I’m not asking for much! Yet, I sit here in this reality knowing that moments like that are fleeting.

    If I have to escape for a while in my imagined world for some respite, I do so unashamedly.

    I put on some good records, maybe cook up a delicious meal, have a soak in the tub,  play in my hair, or watch Black Cinderella (I have the DVD but you can watch it here) for the 900th time. It may sound like your run-of-the-mill self care day, but for me it’s much deeper than that. I’m going to be happy whether the world likes it or not, damn it.

    It may not be enough and I find it difficult to give advice when I’m still figuring this out for myself; but if you can find some spot of peace, embrace it with everything you’ve got. Look into therapy if you haven’t already. Therapy For Black Girls has an incredible network of providers and a bomb podcast too. Forgive yourself for not always feeling up to the challenge to take on the world. Give yourself grace when you fall short of your own expectations. And finally, love yourself deeply and with all the wild abandon you can muster.

    Because music can communicate things that are otherwise hard to say, here’s a Spotify playlist for you. It’s all Black women from a range of eras and music genres that I think are worth a listen. Put it on when you want to feel free and easy. Tell us what songs you’d like or what songs you’d like to add in the comments. 

    I see you, sis. Are you okay? Really?

    Header: Ian Kiragu